pete8tch 0 Posted January 27, 2005 Report Share Posted January 27, 2005 Think you might like these! TESTICULATING - Waving your arms around and talking b*llocks. BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible. SEAGULL MANAGER - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves. ASSMOSIS - The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard. SALMON DAY - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die. CUBE FARM - An office filled with cubicles. PRAIRIE DOGGING - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also applies to applause from a promotion because there may be cake.) MOUSE POTATO - The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato. SITCOMs - Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a "home business". STRESS PUPPY - A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE - The fine art of whacking the cr*p out of an electronic device to get it to work again. ADMINISPHERE - The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. This is often affiliated with the dreaded "administrivia" needless paperwork and processes. 404 - Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. OHNOSECOND - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just made a BIG mistake (e. g. you've hit 'reply all') GOING FOR A McSHIT - Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is known as a McShit with Lies. AEROPLANE BLONDE - One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'. BEER COAT - The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3am in the morning. BEER COMPASS - The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live,how you got here, and where you've come from. JOHNNY-NO-STARS - A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training. MILLENNIUM DOMES - The contents of a Wonderbra, i. e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually nought in there worth seeing. MONKEY BATH - A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo!Oo! Ho! Aa! Aa! Aa!". MYSTERY BUS - The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in. SWAMP-DONKEY - A deeply unattractive woman BOBFOC - Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch. Link to post Share on other sites
danb 0 Posted January 27, 2005 Report Share Posted January 27, 2005 some gug uns there !mcshit think we've all been there Link to post Share on other sites
danb 0 Posted January 27, 2005 Report Share Posted January 27, 2005 some gud uns there !mcshit think we've all been there [ Edited Thu Jan 27 2005, 06:06PM ] Link to post Share on other sites
Geastb 0 Posted January 28, 2005 Report Share Posted January 28, 2005 Nice one pete - some blinders there! Link to post Share on other sites
dubloke 4 Posted February 8, 2005 Report Share Posted February 8, 2005 a few good guffaws were had there! nice one! Link to post Share on other sites
pete8tch 0 Posted February 8, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2005 oh yes aeroplane blonde, just love that Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts