cadguy77 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Here it is, VR6oc.com's Worst Joke of the Year Competition.I know one of the ladies on this forum will probably clinch the coveted crown, but I like a challenge.Here goes:____________________________________________________A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.The case came up in court. The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say for himself. The man replied, “Well your Honour, it was like this: When the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat down under a sign that said, ‘The Double Mint Twins are Coming ' and I grinned." "Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, ‘Logan’s Liniment will reduce the swelling ‘, and I had to smile." "Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said, "William’s Big Stick Did the Trickâ€, and I could hardly contain myself.""BUT, your Honour, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, ‘Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident' ... I just lost it. "CASE DISMISSED" ____________________________________________________ :@ x) ( :@ :@ :@ Link to post Share on other sites
Maz 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Don't think I can beat that Cadders, It's bloody awful! LOL! But then you never know... give me a mo, I'll stand up and pull one out my arse Here you go,A guy walked into a bar and saw a sign that said, "Cheese sandwich, £2; chicken sandwich, £3; handjob, £10." He said to the beautiful barmaid, "Are you the one who gives the handjobs?" She said, "Yeah." He said, "Then go wash your hands. I want a cheese sandwich." Link to post Share on other sites
richievr 1 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 i can do MUCH worse that that . . . . .2 blondes walked into a building...you would have though one of them would have seen it!!! x) x) x) Link to post Share on other sites
Whitedog 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 madge, i'm begging you, please can you change your avatar.......its freakin me out big stix...cheers Link to post Share on other sites
Flog 1 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Two cannibals eating a clown.One say to the other......."Does this taste funny to you?" Link to post Share on other sites
Maz 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Alright Stu, just cause you asked so nicely. Would you like something less abrasive? Don't know what's so wrong with it, Cadguy had one showing himself and no one complained... Loving the jokes, they're all right up my street Link to post Share on other sites
Whitedog 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Don't know what's so wrong with it' date=' Cadguy had one showing himself and no one complained... [/quote']PMSLMuch better thanks madge, cant beat a good mullet..... Link to post Share on other sites
cadguy77 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Don't know what's so wrong with it' date=' Cadguy had one showing himself and no one complained... [/quote']PMSLI felt the silent cringes, that's why i took it down Link to post Share on other sites
Maz 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 you fishing again Cadders? I think it's good when people put themselves as their avatar, then you know who you're talking to !shy Can't believe how mean you've all been about me though, quite uncalled for Link to post Share on other sites
nd 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches ?! A nervous wreck. Link to post Share on other sites
Whitedog 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Two grains of sand were walking together in the desert. Suddenly, one turned to the other and said, "Dude, I think we're being followed." Link to post Share on other sites
cadguy77 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 Two grains of sand were walking together in the desert. Suddenly' date=' one turned to the other and said, "Dude, I think we're being followed."[/quote']Now THAT'S bad Dog ( Link to post Share on other sites
Petesvw 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 What doesn't fit? A dead epileptic!!!Sorry, i know, but hey, i wanna win too ; ) Link to post Share on other sites
Whitedog 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 ha ha pete, had to read that one twice.....doh Link to post Share on other sites
nd 0 Posted March 20, 2006 Report Share Posted March 20, 2006 i had to read it 3 times,could'nt read epileptic right %-6 you know when u get one of them moments where u just cant get ur head round it maby thats just me :? :! Link to post Share on other sites
vr6 g3 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 Two old women were sat on a park bench and a nude bloke walks past, one had a stroke and the other couldn't reach.Boom boom. Link to post Share on other sites
Maz 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 Well people, Think I can safely say I'm out of the running Some of them are shocking !amazed Vix, that nervous wreak one's fantastic, you're not doing it justice in here Link to post Share on other sites
VRVIRGIN 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 I've just received this one, it clear winner i think. With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world right now, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week.Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Cokey", died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the troublestarted. ( Link to post Share on other sites
cadguy77 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 I've just received this one' date=' it clear winner i think. With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world right now, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week.Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Cokey", died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the troublestarted. ( [/quote'] !amazed !lol !amazed !grr !shy Now that made me chuckle, so in terms of being the worst, that can't win Link to post Share on other sites
Maz 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 I've just received this one' date=' it clear winner i think. Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Cokey", died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the troublestarted. ( [/quote']No way! Even my 7yr old knows that one... If you think that's funny Cadders you win on having the lamest sense of humour! Link to post Share on other sites
Whitedog 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 A pony walks into a bar and says "Bartender, may I have a drink?" Bartender says "What? I can't hear you. Speak up!" "May I please have a drink?" "What? You have to speak up!" "Could I please have a drink?" "Now listen, if you don't speak up I will not serve you." "I'm sorry, I'm just a little hoarse." Link to post Share on other sites
thegoth 5 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 Well I've finally plucked up courage to post these two.firstly, olden but not so golden:Whats the difference between a buffalo and a bison?You can't wash your hands in a buffalo.And a complete non joke:What are elephants large and grey?'cos if they where small and white they'd be asprins.Who say's goths dont have a sense of humour!TG Link to post Share on other sites
richievr 1 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 that seriously is funny!!! Link to post Share on other sites
katconcarne 0 Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 !lolWhat do you call a black guy who flies a plane?A pilot, you racist!In itself that's a pretty crap joke, but just go it ask a few friends, believe me the answers you get back are incredibly funny! Link to post Share on other sites
Guest vwsyncro Posted March 21, 2006 Report Share Posted March 21, 2006 it is yellow and when you get it in your eye, then you die ( what is it :? -----------------a trainwell the trains in holland are yellow !dodge this most be the worst joke in here !mistrust Link to post Share on other sites
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